My Ultimate Fantasy-Shereen Bhan

As a school going boy, I was unlike my other contemporaries. No across-the-window crushes, no penchant for all fair looking girls. I didn’t experience any high seeing Bollywood or Hollywood actresses & I guess this has continued till date.

But that was that. Intelligence combined with aesthetics, looks combined with innocence & tantrums along with sweet-timbre were some of the things that had the adrenaline pumping. Then, just like that, it happened. I mean that special liking for someone. They taught me that it happens suddenly. Plus all the self-help books say the same thing.

However, I wasn’t concerned. She was close to 5 feet 5,her hair were like nothing I had seen before, her smile as if the blossoming flowers of the spring, occasionally she talked with her eyes & her dressing sense was impeccable.Her name- Shereen Bhan.The moment I see her on-screen, bells start to ring in my head & just one thing comes to mind:

“Banane waale ne bhi kya cheez banayi hai”.

Shereen Bhan- a Delhi bureau Chief & Executive Editor of CNBC TV 18- is a St.Stephens College,Delhi graduate in Philosophy (I studied at St.Stephens-Chandigarh).She has her masters in Mass Communication from Pune with Film & Television as her specialized subject (she topped the class as well as the university). Before joining CNBC, she was the associate producer for U-TV. Daughter of a fighter pilot of the Indian Air Force, she produces all of her own shows & has rubbed her shoulders with the likes of Siddhartha Basu (she did her internship for a couple of months under him)& Vir Sanghvi (for a current affairs show on Star TV).

Those are quite a lot of achievements for the girl that I just so adore.She currently hosts show like India Business Hour, Young Turks, Power Turk, Overdrive-The Auto car show & many others.Her day starts at 9 & ends at 11pm with mornings spent in reporting,afternoons in scripting & editing, while evenings in studio managing people & supervising shows. Every time, I surf through the innumerable channels of my Tele, more often than not, I find her on screen. But I try to control my excitement, since my Dad is in the same room but he won’t read this article; he ain’t that tech savvy.

The flamboyance with she presents her shows & the elegance in her voice is absolutely mystifying. The twitch that I feel seeing her high cheek-boned face along with that coquettish smile makes me believe that she is some kind of prodigy. No wonder the leading Women magazine, FEMINA included her among 20 most beautiful faces of the year in 2005, September issue & VOGUE voted her amongst top 50 most beautiful women in year 2008, October issue.

Shereen Ma’am, if you ever happen to read this, just remember that a young-accidental-Engineer is completely in love with your crescent smile. You are simply amazing with what ever you do. So all I’m asking for is a date with you on a fine evening. I might not be able to take you to a sumptuous outlet but I assure you that you will have the time of your life.

So Ma’am, cheers to your stunning persona & I hope that your loveliness goes on & on…

The ‘Cunning’ Fairer Sex

The phrase fairer sex must have been coined by some novice who probably never understood the intricacies of the modern world. Now calling the fairer sex ‘cunning’ might have consequences, considering the fact that majority of the readers of my blog are girls & the fact that I still don’t have a girl-friend.

But I guess, I will boast my ego by acting gutsy & brag just one more time, the title of my blog (read-the iconoclast) & bring certain facts(read-not generalizations) in front of my readers.

With cunning, I mean clever & yes I also mean deceitful. But here, cunning signifies ‘crafty’. The fairer sex knows the art of manipulating the macho sex & this has been continuing for ages.

(Notice that I use Present perfect continuous tense.)The ironical thing is that we are just not ready to admit it. Obviously, one reason is our obsession with looks which continually makes us believe:

‘What are little girls made up of?

Sugar, spice and all things nice’

Amongst other reasons, well, I will revert back to the word crafty.Yes; they subtly craft the whole issue to make you believe that the matter is plain & practical. And because we already have given them the Godly status, we are forced to concede to their viewpoint. In the whole game, they have once again made a ‘popput’ out of men (Read-Boys, they still treat you like that, don’t they).

Now, one of my friend says:  'A girl can make a boy do anything’

I reply: ‘Yes, almost anything’.

He has handled variety when it comes to the fairer sex.

And I, well, I have observed & analyzed variety.And guess what, so far-so good.

The day men start using their brains before believing women blindly, we would have a peaceful world. Go down the history lane, & two epics come to mind; ‘Mahabharata’ and ‘Ramayana’.

What was the cause???...

And now I will get straight into your face:

How many times have you fought with your friends over a girl….

& when was the last time when your boss scolded you over confidential information leaked, courtesy the gorgeous girl in your Bay...

The fairer sex is made that way & the macho sex can’t live without them. AND if you, the boys, have the right to flirt, then they, the girls, have the right to manipulate.

So, here's the solution:

I’m a hard-core believer of street-smart ideas.Since, we can’t get around them or through them, let’s negotiate with them:

1)They are just girls, don’t give them the divine status.

2)Nowhere is it written that beautiful girls are simple, honest and kind. Stop

assuming it.

3)Girls are complex yet their behavioral pattern is predictable.So,use your head or else consult someone who has handled variety.

4)And please, for heavens sake, stop fighting with other people over girls. It shall land you nowhere.

5)Lastly, read the above rules atleast twice every month.We, the boys, tend to forget them, everytime we look at something close to 36-24-36.

After reading the above, sentiments are bound to get hurt, I know.But, India is a democracy. They taught me, you have the right to your opinion. Never mind, that we still keep coming on to streets over petty religious issues & show our liberalism by banning books and issuing fatwas.

The future will be less tense if girls are analyzed on the basis of past observations, which suddenly reminds me that tomorrow morning at 7,I have to teach tenses & it's already ten past two, so I better doze off.

Stress interview- Is it worth the hype

It is the word which sends a shiver down the spine. Stress interviews get us in an uncanny situation. So let’s see if these interviews are really worth the hype.

Current Trend

In 2009, most of the top notch B-schools (Read IIM’s and MDI - Gurgaon included) did not take stress interview. One off case might be there but it’s not a general trend, considering their reputation and the high pressure curriculum that they follow.

Much ado about nothing??

Well, this is not to say that stress interviews don’t happen. But, it’s a rare chance that you enter and you are bombarded with a question like:

‘How many auto rickshaws are plying in your city?’

‘If this be the third floor then how many stairs did you climb up to reach up to this place?’

Handling the stress interview

Most good interviewers will want you to verbalize your thoughts freely. The panel is interested in your thought process rather than trying to put you under pressure right from the word go. Unless there is some impetus or stimuli from the candidate’s side, there is little chance of a stress interview, unless instructed specifically to the panel. But, if you try to act smart in front of them, then let me tell you, the panel loves to get entertained by ‘youngistan’ which tries to build castles in air without getting their facts or rationale right.

Logic behind stress interview

The usual reason – the person would have to deal with lots of stress while on job, so let’s see how he/she deals with stress. This is a clichéd logic having lots of assumptions. If you try to put people under artificial pressure, more often than not, it would not reveal the actual strengths & talents of the candidate, which in turn, actually defeats the purpose of an interview.

So be rest assured, the panel is vastly experienced and they want you to be informative, rather than the panel displaying their own knowledge with stress related questions,as is normally thought.

Just bear in mind:

If you say, you play guitar, you have to show us how you stand out.

Goldman Sachs, for example, not only expects you to be aware about the firm; business and culture but also wants you to ask questions about the firm during the interview.

So, good luck with your next interview.

A Puncher Boy...

He barely reached up to my hips but managed to take out the front wheel of my bike in less than 2 minutes.

I wonder if could do the same, considering I’m some sort of an engineer. He is 10 yrs old & has been working for 2 yrs from 3pm till 8.In the morning he attends school. His pay, a meager 900 Rs for the whole month.

I earn about 11 times as much as he does, working almost the same number of hours.

I ask him if he has got interest in studies, & with a 70mm smile, he replies in affirmative. His mother died 2yrs back, his face expressions absolutely impassive when he says the same. His father is a Rickshaw-puller who tells him to study and learn some trade side-by-side.

In our part of the country, child labour was supposedly banned (excuse me for using the wrong verb), child labour is banned. But I encounter these things in routine. My degree, my skills & other traits which, at times, are praised by the Big-Wigs of our city, look a mere illusion in front of the 10yr old. He faces everything boldly & is not reluctant to admit what he goes through in his daily life. A year back he used to earn 300 Rs a month. One of my friend gets 4 times as much as pocket-money in a month plus some extra bucks which he manages to get from his mother after making her ‘Senti’ with his usual talks.

Said a great author once, In ‘capitalism’ man exploits man, in ‘socialism’ the reverse is true. This talk of helping the poor, removing poverty, opposing child-labour & taking steps to make the lives of street-urchins humane, all sounds like a big-fucking-monotonous lie.

How many of us have donated money in charity in the last 1 yr??(& how many times),but most of us did visit the temple & offered sweets to the local priests after getting placed in big MNC’s,more out of obligation than willingness.

“ho gaya, 1 puncher tha. chalo fit kar dun isse”,he says. Both of us are sweating. It's 42 degrees. I go inside my house & drink water from a chilled bottle. I realize that the little boy would also be craving for cold water. I pour it in a glass & offer him. He gulps it, bottoms up.

Most of us forget to do the same, although we do offer water to any guest visiting our place, difference in social strata, I suppose.It’s a hypocritical society that we live in & I’m its not-so-proud, as-of-now- helpless part. But I will continue to do my little contributions. When I drop him back to his shop, I think of offering some extra money. But then I decide, I won’t hurt his self-respect by offering a small amount.

Ohh..., I almost got myself killed, a girl in a yellow-Lancer with gogs on. She passes a smile while gesturing with her hand to say sorry. These smiles, I tell you, they can melt many a heart.

I suddenly realize, it’s my sister’s birthday, I have booked a cake. Its cost, well, a little more than one-third of that boys monthly salary.

Love of the loveless

In the darkness of night,

Amidst the intriguing twilight,

the profound silence,

is secretly showing the light.

Million miles away,

there is something that sways.

Is it the full moon on its throne,

or a little boy left on his own.

The moon is on my mind,

but the thoughts derail.

I try to write a sonnet,

but to no avail.

Myriad cute things she did,

tease me seeing my plight.

Its been so long,

but I still miss her at night.

I still remember the texture of hair,

and the curve of her ear.

The blushing she did,

when I looked at her face.

Her fingers touch,

upon my lips.

My hands move,

towards her hips.

She kisses me on that midnight-street,

and sweeps me off my feet.

I close my eyes & hug her tight,

the moon still a silent spectator to our lovely plight.

Is this the figment of my imagination,

or acrimonious was the way we parted.

I still dream of loving you,

as the whole life passes.

As the sordid tale comes to an end,

I start to see a faint light,

All the stars shining bright,

to give it the name,

Love...

Love of the loveless.

Rebel by 20...

To the people who claim to be saints,

And to the people who claim to be priests.

To the people who wear saffron,

And to the people serving as messengers of GOD.

To the people who change color like chameleon,

And to the people who in real are hypocrites.

I claim to be a Rebel

A Rebel by 20.

What religion do you talk of, I ask

when your thoughts are evil and satanic.

Which peace are you trying to spread,

having a clasp-knife beside your torso.

What tolerance are you trying to teach,

when bigotry is all you preach

To you, I claim to be a Rebel

A Rebel by 20.

To their distress and misery,

they seek the ‘so called’ God.

In the pangs of separation and desolation,

they piety the ‘so called’ God.

How pretentious & superficial their way of living,

rebuking the penniless beggar after snubbing & kicking.

To you, I claim to be a Rebel

A Rebel by 20.

To my mates who claim to be friends,

And to my friends who claim to be brothers.

To the one busy with his girl-friend,

while I face alone the tornado.

To the one enjoying the status of celebrity,

while I sulk alone the ignominy.

To you, once a friend, I claim to be a Rebel

A Rebel by 20.

To the heart that once loved me,

I see the disavowed arrogance.

To the heart that talked of happiness,

I see the subtle shift towards wealth.

To the heart that promised unconditional love,

I see the impassive callousness.

To you, once a sweetheart, I claim to be a Rebel

A Rebel by 20.

The game is not about becoming somebody,

it is about becoming nobody.

The game is not about defeating them,

it is about winning with my defined rules.

As I pass them, I hear whispers,

they call me a ‘Rebel’.

But I am not a Rebel

Without a cause.

The girl that wasn't...

Many hidden talents you have,

And many traits that make you unique,

Your name,it is heard in high places,

And you are the blue-eyed candy of every man

Yes you are!!!

But who will be with you forever,

You just cannot tell...

You talk with an air of confidence,

You smile like a blossoming flower,

You walk with an army gait,

With a pedigree still unparalleled,

Yes you do!!!

But who will be with you, my lovely

When you are out of all this dudette traits...

Your whimsical dressing sense attracts,

When you saunter across the lake side,

And when you finally pass me a smile

I see the sadistic pleasure that you get

In taunting the already crazy boy

Yes I do!!!

But who will be with you, my lovely

When you are out of all this dudette traits...

The Egyptian Hieroglyph that you wear is splendid,

The ear-rings that you wear are amazing,

The bracelet in your hand is capricious,

And your loveliness goes on & on

Yes it does!!!

And all these things when combined

Shimmer like the half moon in the unblemished sky.

They say when you will get married,

It will be to a millionaire

But whether he will treat you like a Princess

Is a question that you have to ask yourself

Because, frankly these people don’t give a damn

No they don’t!!!

So you can go on & forget me forever

As I bid you a final good-bye

But please be careful, my lovely

As the bonhomie in the world is all fake

Yes it is!!!

So who will be with you forever

You just cannot tell...

Life - A conundrum

He sat quietly in a thoughtful mood,
Talking to himself,
He started to brood.

A question:
Was life unfair to me?
Is life unfair to me?
Will life be unfair to me?

The thoughts enter his mind
And ruffle him,
Continually one after the other,
Trouble him.

At once he wants somebody to expound,
Myriad questions,
That continue to rebound.

With nobody around him,
He starts to despair,
All alone in the room,
He finally declares:

In silence there is introspection
And in silence there is peace of mind
In silence there is tranquility
And in silence there is serenity

Life is a game,
And we are always probing
Unaware of the rules,
We are always cribbing

Life to thou is not unfair
Life to thou will not be unfair

Don’t justify it,
Don’t condemn it.
Don’t eulogise it,
Don’t damn it.

Just embrace it without fear,
As in its perplexity
Will lie its vital experience.

The complexity is deep,
And the problem unmoved
As he still sits quietly
In a thoughtful mood.

A Walk to Remember...

Walking besides the meadows lush green,
I see a girl wearing a suit that is green,
With a hassling face, she suddenly exclaims:
“I lost my way & my bus
Is waiting somewhere down the street”


At once with her, I start to tread the path,
Having a feeling of an unusual qualm.


Inspite of stilettos, she strolls along,
Oh, What a pretty lass !!
I exclaim !! and walk along.
Her anklet produces an uncanny sound,
The stories behind which are deep and profound.


When she finally moves her mouth to speak,
I feel the blood-rush to my feet.
The words of ‘English’ spontaneously come out,
‘Convent educated’ for sure !!
And I continue to mock her some more!!


“Ahem !! Ahem !!”, she says
“Mayhem !! Mayhem !!”, I say….


The pampered girl slows her pace,
Flaunting the sapphire at my face,
Her candour begins to gild my den !!
An innocent ‘boy’ begins to
Love a girl there and then !!


Judiciously realizing the right street,
Coming as a harbinger of joy in the scorching heat.
With a coquettish smile,
She finally alluded,
The only thing that I so dreaded.


I get down on my knees,
And I hold her left-hand with my right.
I implore, I beg & I go to every extreme,
Please, don’t go; please don’t go,
I silently scream…….


I promise, to keep you happy & smiling
Now and Forever……..


Both her hands reach my shoulder,
As she brings me up to my feet.
She hurls her hand within my hair,
Smiles slyly
And walks away……..


Her name was Zoe,
And Zoe means ‘life’
And yes indeed !! she gave me life,
So what, if for some moments


At times, I wish
If I will ever meet her again.
If she will embrace me in her arms,
And cajole me like a kid.


Simultaneously my hand,
Reaches the eyelids,
And I wipe the tear,
That would have trickled down the cheek.


I try to smile,
While I tread back the same path.
Hearing the rhapsodic music,
I see the coming wistful dawn.


Now, when I look back, I realize
That yes indeed, it was
A Walk…
A Walk to Remember…